


there's a snake in my-

by mytsukkishine



Series: Baby, It's Cold Outside [10]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Discord: Umino Hours, French Kissing, Hatake Kakashi Is Trying, M/M, Mentioned Mitarashi Anko, Netflix and Chill, No Snakes Were Harmed in This Fic I promise, Only Kakashi lmao, Prompt: Bad Presents, Umino Hours Winter Bingo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:33:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28649853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mytsukkishine/pseuds/mytsukkishine
Summary: That one lucky moment where Iruka finally got to ask Kakashi to a Netflix and chill date, only to get interrupted by a 60-kilo snake opening his closet door that resulted in Kakashi screaming.Is his chance ruined? Will Kakashi talk to him again? And why does Anko's snake knows how to open a fucking door??
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka
Series: Baby, It's Cold Outside [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2034916
Comments: 8
Kudos: 75
Collections: The Umino Hours Winter Bingo 2020





	there's a snake in my-

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hades_bitch](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hades_bitch/gifts).



> ahh this fic is really impulsive and imma point everything to Hades XD  
> She helped me, and inspired me so here is this disaster fic hahah
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this as much as Kakashi did lmao jk
> 
> This fic is inspired by this tiktok video of a snake opening a door lmao  
> [here](https://www.tiktok.com/@666zomey/video/6914157190987271430)

This is it. The moment Iruka has been waiting for. Kakashi Hatake outside his doorway with a pizza in his hand, and looking so goddamn handsome with his hair all slicked back. 

Iruka beams Kakashi a smile, taking the pizza box in his hand as he opens the door wider for the silver-haired man. 

"Hey, just in time." 

Kakashi smiles back, his usually pale cheeks dusted with pink. 

"I bought some pizza. Pepperoni with extra cheese, just how you wanted it." 

Iruka blushes and ushers Kakashi inside, closing the door with his heart beating rapidly against his chest. Excited for what is to come for them later on. 

And as Iruka points out to Kakashi the living room, kitchen, and bathroom, Iruka can't help but remember how much their relationship progressed. 

The two of them have known each other since Iruka started working for Senju Corp. It was eight months ago, and Kakashi was his senior. He was annoying at first, obnoxious, and a little conceited, but then one night, Iruka's car suddenly broke down and Kakashi was the only person who offered to help- even going as far as offering Iruka rides every day until his car is fixed. The brunet was hesitant considering he didn't know Kakashi well that much, but the silver-haired man wouldn't take no for an answer. 

And oh boy was Iruka glad he took the offer. 

He got to know him, got to laugh and talk about stuff that wasn't work related. And then eight months into their friendship, Iruka realized that he likes Kakashi. With a few pushes from his friends- mainly Anko, Izumo, and Kotetsu- Iruka built up the courage to ask Kakashi last week if he wanted to go on a date and, as if the stars were singing above him, Kakashi said yes. 

Their date went fantastic and ended up with a good-bye kiss and maybe a little make-out session in front of Iruka's apartment door. Since then, they've been texting nonstop (as if they haven't been doing that before), and even gave each other some winks and smiles during work. 

And now, as Iruka places the pizza on a plate so they won't have to bring the box- Kakashi steps behind him, his arms circling Iruka's waist as he tells the brunet about his day. 

"...and that's how I managed to convince Tenzou to babysit Naruto today for me." 

"Your friend seems nice. You should treat him some time." Iruka says and closes the pizza box. 

"I will," Kakashi then grabs for the plate of pizza and waits for Iruka to grab their glasses. Soon enough, Iruka and Kakashi find themselves in Iruka's room, seated comfortably on the bean bags with Netflix on display. 

Lights off and the movie playing now, Iruka snuggles further next to Kakashi- ready to spend the rest of the night with the man that he absolutely adores. 

Ten minutes into the movie, Kakashi has his arm around Iruka's shoulder. 

"What's that room?" Kakashi asks all of the sudden, finally taking notice of one room, which he assumes is Iruka's closet, which has its lights open. 

"Oh, my closet." Iruka answers and takes a bite of the pizza, even shyly offering Kakashi a bite from it. Iruka doesn't really want to talk about that room for he suddenly remembers Julius is in the closet. 

Julius is Anko's snake. She asked him two days ago if Iruka could snake-sit for a while since Iruka is quite familiar with snakes, he agreed. 

But anyway, Kakashi doesn't need to know Julius is in there. He's in his tank, safe, and probably asleep. 

The two of them continue to eat and watch the movie until all four pizza slices are gone. Relaxed and content, Iruka and Kakashi finally submerge their focus on the movie's plot. 

Halfway through, their focus aren't no longer on the movie for Iruka's eyes are close as his lips move along with Kakashi's. He has his arms around the silver-haired man's neck, pulling him closer, nipping his bottom lip. Kakashi opens his mouth in return, groaning as Iruka tilts his head and inserts his tongue- hungrily tasting every corner of his mouth.

A few minutes in and Iruka is now on Kakashi’s lap, grinding his hips slowly while their hands feel each other up.

A soft thud resounds inside the closet door, but neither cares as Kakashi successfully removes Iruka's shirt. 

With one of Kakashi's hands on his nipples, while his other holds Iruka's waist gently, Iruka proceeds to kiss his way down the other man's jaw; peppering it with small licks and nips until he reaches Kakashi's neck- just right below the ear. 

And as Iruka slowly unbuttons Kakashi's shirt, the silver-haired man opens his eyes just in time to see the closet door creaking open, ever so slowly. 

"What-" 

"Hm?" Iruka hums, drawing his lips off of Kakashi, and raises his brow in confusion as to why Kakashi has such a scared expression on his face. Following where Kakashi is looking at, Iruka's eyes widen as a gasp escapes his lips. 

There, they see his closet door slowly opening, and it's scary, yes, but the thing is, instead of a ghost or some burglar, there against the door, reaching about three feet high, is an albino Burmese python snake. It's long body, measuring about thirteen feet, can be seen up against the door with its head resting on the handle. 

Iruka and Kakashi stare at the reptile with bewilderment, watching with keen eyes as the python slowly pushes the door open. It stays up for only a few seconds before dropping down on the ground like a sack of flour, making the couple jump in surprise. 

Iruka opens his mouth, wondering how did that 60 pounds albino Burmese python escape its tank, however, before he can speak, Kakashi screeches right next to his ear, almost deafening him. 

The brunet doesn't know what's more surprising, the fact that Kakashi screamed or the snake opening his door. And before Iruka knows it, Kakashi stands up, dragging him along by the waist and onto the bed they go. 

"A-A-A snake! A big snake! Ah-why? Should we call the police?" Kakashi's voice is loud, his arms tightening around Iruka as he looks at the idle snake on the ground. 

"H-how did it end up here? Oh my-Iruka! It's moving! It's moving!" Kakashi yells as he scrambles to scoot backwards with Iruka still in his hold, the brunet's back pressed against his chest. 

"Wait, Kakashi-" And the moment Iruka turns back to calm Kakashi down, he sees the always so cool and composed Kakashi rolls his eyes back, his mouth hanging open as his body drops back down on the bed- his head barely missing the headboard. 

_ Shit.  _ Iruka thinks as panic starts to rise up within him. He didn't expect Kakashi to react this way. Heck, he isn't expecting Anko's goddamn  _ snake  _ to have the ability to open its cage and the closet door. 

Iruka really needs to have a long talk with Anko after this, and he needs to re-evaluate as to why he agreed to babysit the snake when he knows he has a date. But before anything else, Iruka needs to tend to Kakashi first because, damn, the man is out cold. 

So much for Netflix and chill. 

  
  


~~*~~

  
  


After that embarrassing Friday night yesterday, the weekend rolls by too quickly and honestly, Iruka feels bad with happened. He tried to wake him up, but after half an hour of him wiping a damp towel over his handsome face, Iruka finally decided to call Gai- his other senior and Kakashi's friend. 

Fortunately, Gai was kind enough to watch over Kakashi while Iruka sorted out the snake problem. He called Anko after, asking her to go home and deal with her snake. 

Once Kakashi woke up about an hour later, he was still dizzy. Iruka kept apologizing, explaining to the two men that the snake was already locked in his housing. Kakashi only smiled, his voice laced with awkwardness. He said his goodbye as soon as he woke up. Iruka really wanted him to say, but he guessed they both have had enough embarrassment for a while. 

And as Iruka watched him leave with Gai holding onto him, he felt a little pang in his chest as he tried his best to push away the possibility of Kakashi not talking to him again

Who wouldn't, right?

After moping all night, and ranting to Anko about why she taught her snake to open doors, only for her to reason out,  _ 'What if there's a fire and Julius needs to get out?'. _ Anko finally agreed that she'll get her snake tomorrow. 

And as tomorrow came, Anko already dropped by to retrieve the ever so nice, and friendly Julius the albino Burmese python with the promise of ramen for two weeks. 

But still no messages or calls from Kakashi. 

Iruka pouts as he takes a bite of the reheated pizza from last night. Should he text Kakashi again? Well, he did send him a morning message, asking if he's alright, and now with the clock ticking to seven in the evening, Kakashi still hasn't responded. 

Is this the end of a beautiful friendship and a blooming love? If it is, man does it sting. He kind of feels something deeper for Kakashi. 

Just then, as Iruka is about to take a second bite of his pizza, the doorbell rings. The brunet frowns, thinking who can be at the door late this night. He plans to ignore it but then it rings again. 

Iruka sighs, accepting defeat and slowly makes his way over to his front door. With a frown and the pizza still in his mouth, he yanks the door open. 

Iruka gasps, the pizza in his mouth falls down as his eyes stare at the man in front of him. There, by his doorway is none other than Kakashi looking so good with his skinny jeans, tight blue shirt, and messy hair. 

Iruka feels so naked all of the sudden for he's still in his pyjamas. 

"Kakashi." Iruka says, a little breathless. 

The silver-haired man raises his hand to scratch the back of his neck while his other holds a small brown paper bag. 

"Hi, Iruka. I-uhm. I came here to apologize about yesterday." Kakashi starts and Iruka quickly picks up the fallen pizza from the floor. The brunet opens his door wider and Kakashi takes it as a sign to come in. 

"I didn't mean to... you know," and as a light pink hue covers Kakashi's cheek, Iruka can't help but to get a little teary. Putting the slice of pizza somewhere on the counter, Iruka leans forward and circles his arms around Kakashi's neck, not caring anymore if he still hasn't taken a bath yet. 

"I- I'm sorry too." Kakashi smiles down at Iruka and wraps one arm around the brunet's waist. "And I'm glad you didn't… run and decided to-" 

"Oh? Oh no, of course, I won't." Kakashi drops a kiss on Iruka's nose, "I would never."

Iruka's cheek is instantly covered in red as he accepts another kiss from the silver-haired man, this time on his forehead. 

"Really?" 

"Yes. Even if you have two more snakes, I won't. In fact," Kakashi draws back and shows Iruka the brown paper bag he's holding, "I bought an offering for your snake." 

Iruka steps back a little, "A what?" 

"A present for your snake." Kakashi shakes the bag gently, "Don't worry they're dead." 

"What?" 

"Mice…" Kakashi says, his voice sounding a little unsure. At this point, Iruka tries to search his brain as to why Kakashi has a few dead mice with him, but then again, he never told the other that the Burmese python isn't his. 

"Kakashi…" Iruka starts off, taking the paper bag gently away from Kakashi, "This is sweet but the snake wasn't mine." 

"Huh?" 

"It's actually my friend's. She asked me to babysit the snake for two days and somehow it escaped my mind to warn you about it because honestly, I didn't know he could escape his… Tank."

"Well," Kakashi interrupts by chuckling, shaking his head a little as he helps Iruka put down the brown paper bag. "My apologies then, I guess it's an offering for your friend to not let you babysit while I'm here?" 

"Hm. Cute." Amidst the soft giggles, the two of them hug each other with Iruka burying his face on the crook of Kakashi's neck- getting a small whiff of his cologne. 

They remain in each other's arms for a moment, basking in one another's embrace- totally erasing both of their embarrassment. It isn't long after when Iruka speaks, his voice muffled. 

"But you know, mice aren't enough for Julius. He's on a rabbit and deer strict diet." 

Kakashi laughs, rubbing his arms up and down the expanse of Iruka's back, "Hmm, Julius has quite the well-balanced diet huh?" 

"Yeah…" Iruka then looks up with a small pout adorning his face, "We didn't finish what we started last night…" 

"And here I am, bringing you dead mice instead of human food." Their lips meet after and soon enough, the two of them walk into the living room with Kakashi calling for takeout sushi. 

And as they enter Iruka's room while their mouths are glued together, Kakashi jokingly opens Iruka's closet door that only resulted in him being pulled to the bed by the collar. 

**Author's Note:**

> ahhh rip kakashi and his paper bag lmao 
> 
> please do tell me what you think XD  
> also, i'm not related to the owner of Julius the snake, i just find it so awesome the snake can do that XD <3
> 
> comment and kudos are appreciated so much ^^


End file.
